I want it clearly understood that I do not despise Roger Clemens because he took steroids and HGH. All top-class athletes, with only a very few exceptions, do. I despise him because he is despicable. He is not just an idiot; he is the King of idiots. In fact, I had long ago come to the conclusion that he is probably the idiot of all time. His asinine, lying, dishonest and bullying performance in the last couple of days shows what a lowclass fool he truly is. I would call him trailer trash but that's an insult to those who are white trash and live in trailers. I would like to quote the following comment which came from the CBS "60 Minutes" website because it shows exactly how those of us who are long-time Red Sox fans and suffered through the Clemens Era really feel. Unfortunately the comment was unattributed, so I cannot thank whoever wrote it.

"It comes down to credibility. I lived in Boston during Clemens' entire run. Every season, there were nasty incidents involving Roger which didn't get national press. Things like going to a California golf course with three buddies during a west coast road trip and making a nasty scene because they wouldn't comp him and his buddies with free golf. But, when he's asked about these things, he always denies or deflects and blames the other guy. Take the 1986 'Bill Buckner' game. People forget that Clemens took himself out of that game and then denied it later. The person he called a liar then was John McNamara, one of the most honorable and respected managers in the league. That's his pattern. And this assertion that he has 'always' worked hard, the hardest working guy in baseball, is just false. From '93 to '96 in Boston, he showed up at spring training overweight and out of shape. From 1993 through July of 1996 he was 34-36 with an ERA of 4.00. He was 4-10 through July of 1996 when he suddenly realizes that he's a free agent at the end of of the season and pitches an unreal August, 4-1 with an 1.85 ERA. So, I basically think the guy is a scum-bag with no credibility."

"I don't know anything about Brian McNamee at all, But I do know that the ONLY way he could blow his immunity was to lie, in which case he goes directly to jail. My guess is that Clemens treated him like garbage the same way he treats everybody else and that he didn't hesitate to rat him out." 

Where does one begin? To start with, Clemens acts as though he's shocked that anyone would think he took steroids. Bill Simmons, the well-known ESPN columnist, has been accusing Clemens of taking steroids for years. Simmons even said that that weird little vacation Clemens took the first half of the season a couple of years back was by way of being a informal suspension for having tested positive, or for refusing to be tested because he hadn't a prayer to not test positive for steroids, and that that was MLB's way of handling it without destroying Clemens' reputation. (Of course this was pre-Mitchell Report) Then there was that grotesque "60 Minutes" interview, with the exhumed corpse of Mike Wallace feeding Clemens one soft question after another like a bunch of big fat grapes. Even then he did badly, claiming that it proved his innocence that no one had come forward after the Mitchell Report to say that they had sold him, Clemens, syringes and steroids. Because it's Possession Of A Controlled Substance With Intent To Distribute, and they put people in the federal pen for that? Could be, Roger. No one is going to come forward and you know it, you deadheaded jerk. He then trotted out absurdities like taking steroids makes you grow a third ear in the middle of your forehead. The authoress of this blog is an amateur bodybuilder and steroid user. This website is illustrated with several recent photos of me- I believe they were taken in May- I do not see any third ears on myself. He then fell back on the tired old Rafael Palmeiro "They were vitamin B-12 shots" defense. Oh, I see, Roger, so you did get shots from Brian McNamee after all? I have breaking news for you, Roger and Rafael. It is possible to take vitamin B-12 in the form of a pill. In point of fact this is how 99% of the population that takes vitamin B-12 takes it. He then said he took lidocaine injections from McNamee as well. I have been doing some research on lidocaine. Most of us have had it at the dentist's office, where they rub it on your gums before the injection of novocaine is given, to dull the pain from the needle. It is also used before wart removal or minor plastic surgery such as Botox injections for the same reason, to lessen the pain from the procedure. If you had lidocaine injected into your backside you'd basically wind up with a big numb ass, and since that's where Roger Clemens' brain is located one would hardly think this desirable. My opinion about where a cretin like Clemens came up with the drug name lidocaine is that McNamee did use it on Clemens, and he used it as it was meant to be used- he rubbed it on Clemens' behind before injecting him with performance enhancing drugs, to dull the pain from the jab of the needle.

Then yesterday evening at a press conference Clemens really went over the top, playing a call to McNamee he had secretly taped after McNamee sent him an e-mail begging Clemens to speak to his son because his son was dying. Only Clemens would be capable of doing something this low. Of course the call proved nothing, as it consisted of McNamee asking Clemens over and over what he wanted him to do, to go to jail? At no point did he say, "Yes, Roger, I lied to Senator Mitchell" or anything in any way conclusive. Roger spent the rest of the press conference blustering and acting like an idiot; in other words it was classic Clemens.

The next few months should be pretty amusing, what with Clemens filing a suit for defamation against McNamee and being called before Congress to testify as well. Of course there is no doubt in my mind that Clemens is lying. His physical appearance has changed completely since his Boston days and I do not care how "hard" a person works out- they will not add massive amounts of muscle onto their bodies in their late thirties and early forties without the aid of performance enhancing drugs. If a man worked out very hard he might be able to preserve the body he had as a younger man. He would not be able to add greatly to his muscle mass at that age, which is what Clemens has done. Also, Andy Pettitte, Clemens' companion, has confirmed McNamee's statements. Why would McNamee lie about one and tell the truth about the other?

Of course Clemens will wind up perjuring himself at the defamation trial. He is such an idiot he thinks he can get away with perjury. When he takes the witness stand the defense attorneys will make mincemeat out of him. Of course the Texas Con Man has been a liar all his life and all his life he has gotten away with it. But those days are over. By the time Congress gets through with him he will make Rafael Palmeiro the finger-wagger (I never took steroids! Never never!) and the tearful Mark McGwire (Can't we just forget the past? Pretty please?) look dignified by comparison.

Next spring I expect to see him in a striped uniform again. A striped prison uniform.